Windfall

[dreamer_easy]

I had an epiphany in the middle of the night, thanks to the Zen nun I left murmuring on my iPod. I've been feeling frustrated and unworthy because I haven't yet got an original SF novel published, let alone won the Hugo, Nebula, Tiptree, Ditmar, despairing love of all humanity, etc. This is doing things backwards. An apple tree isn't trying to make apples, or thinking 'Why haven't I made apples yet, all my mates are making fantastic apples, I'm never gonna make these freakin' apples'. It just makes a bunch of apples, because that's a hoot, and also because it's an apple tree. Like everything in nature, then, I shall be goalless.

Comments

[timbus.livejournal.com]

*makes biscuits*

[murasaki-1966.livejournal.com]

Two quotes for you that I find helpful when getting stressed about things.


There is really nothing you must be.
And there is nothing you must do.
There is really nothing you must have.
And there is nothing you must know.
There is really nothing you must become.

However, it helps to understand that fire burns,
and when it rains, the earth gets wet.
Japanese Zen scroll

This is what enlightenment is all about: a deep
understanding that there is no problem. Then, with no
problem to solve, what will you do? Immediately you
start living. You will eat, you will sleep, you will
love, you will work, you will have a chit-chat, you
will sing, you will dance. What else is there to do?
Osho

[alawston.livejournal.com]

More to the point, an apple tree probably wouldn't think to itself: "I've made a shitload of Golden Delicious apples which everyone really enjoyed eating, but when's my time to make some freakin' Granny Smiths?"

[george potter (from livejournal.com)]

That's really the best attitude to take. It relieves pressure, and --in my experience -- pressure can be a real enemy to the creative process. When I was younger, and broke through the 'must finish the stories I start' barrier, I made myself a detailed list. I'd sell this many stories to the semi-prozines (rising up the pennies-per-word-scale, natch!) then break into the pro-mags, then write a novel, etc. etc.

Well, it didn't work out that way. I turned out to just not be a novelist. 25,000 words seems to be a pretty damned hard and fast limit for me, and even stories of that length tend to be written over the course of years, with long breaks in between 5,000 word bursts. 5,000 words, actually, seems to be my natural habitat. A little longer or shorter, depending, but always fairly close to that.

But as long as I tried to follow my list, I sold nothing. It wasn't until, a couple years ago, that I threw the thing away and decided to take a year off from submitting (just write for grins n' giggles) that I started to make semi-pro sales. These days I've gotten a little too lax (I really need to get back to a daily quota, that worked well for productivity if nothing else), but I'm enjoying everything I write again, since it's coming without that deep seated dread question: "I wonder if *editor* will like this?' :)

[tysolna]

I think I could do with a Zen nun on my iPod... where can I find her? When I enter "zen nun" as search term, iTunes suggests "men run"... ;)

[outsdr.livejournal.com]

"I shall be goatless."

Good, because goats would eat all your apples.

[george potter (from livejournal.com)]

Even more than a novel, I'd be first in line to buy multiple copies of a collection of your original stories! Ever since you mentioned it in that thread on GB, I've been pining for it. Haha. Lulu is a terrific company, you know. Easy to use. Fun even. Imagine the killer cover! Imagine the witty title! Imagine getting someone to write an embarrassingly praise-filled foreword! (bet Paul Di Filippo would do it! Betcha!) Imagine the ego-boost! Imagine!

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

This is super smart.

(And here is the part where I will also repeat to myself how super smart it is in spite of that little voice in the back of my head saying, 'but I wanna write Doctor Whooooooo' at me. HUMANS. What on earth is wrong with us?)