Saw my shrink this morning, for the first time since February, and took a print-out of my "mental elf" tag to show him. As I thought, my elevated mood thing last week is not long or intense enough as to be diagnosed as hypomania (or worse, bipolar disorder, which I thank Sekhmet I do not have).
My main problem seems to be badly managed stress - it's been a tumultuous year, and it's only July! Stress would explain both up and down moods. With panic attacks a thing of the past, I've let my levels of worry and drivenness slowly build, like the apocryphal boiling frog. I need to get back to relaxation exercises, meditation, ritual, doing things with my hands instead of my head.
I've piked out of tomorrow's Melbourne trip. I got as far as waiting for a taxi in the freezing cold, with both cats in cages ready for boarding, when I finally realised it just wasn't going to happen. I am a little relieved and a lot embarrassed.
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