Star Tribune letter of the day...

[dreamer_easy]

http://www.startribune.com/opinion/letters/81595442.html

Dear Pat Robertson, I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I'm all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I'm no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished. Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth -- glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven't you seen "Crossroads"? Or "Damn Yankees"? If I had a thing going with Haiti, there'd be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox -- that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it -- I'm just saying: Not how I roll. You're doing great work, Pat, and I don't want to clip your wings -- just, come on, you're making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That's working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract. Best, Satan

Comments

[kelemvor.livejournal.com]

*Surfaces from the programming hell of Lotus Script*
Oh, that final line about his contract is just priceless!
BTW, if you're not a member of callahanians (which would surprise me), you might want to check a recent joke featuring the Pope and Rush Limbaugh...
*Goes back to programming hell*

[kateorman.livejournal.com]

*finds*

BAHAHYAQHAHAHAWHWHWHAHAH HA HA HA HA!

[kelemvor.livejournal.com]

I thought that that one might appeal! I'm only surprised that it took this long for someone to come up with it - the previous Pope would have been much more likely to take umbrage at Limbaugh, I think.

(Have you read much of Robinson's stuff, BTW? I can't help thinking that he'd be a great person to get to a Gallifrey One convention.)

[kateorman.livejournal.com]

Rush Limbaugh enters race to the bottom on Haiti. Arghity argh argh wtf argh.

*ahem*

Who is this Robinson of whom you speak? (The answer is probably obvious but alas, my dendrites are still healing.)

[kelemvor.livejournal.com]

This guy. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spider_Robinson) I once ran a few GURPS RPG sessions for a friend, based primarily on Doctor Who, but the end point of each chapter was set either in Callahan's bar or Lady Sally's place, just to see how it would fit. It did.

[jvowles.livejournal.com]

good stuff, that joke!

[lferion]

BWAAAAAA!

Pat Robertson is such a sad little man.

[rdmasters.livejournal.com]

Speaking as a Christian...

Bwhahahahahaha!

That is one of the best things I've read in some time!

People like 'Rev' Robertson give the rest of us a bad name. And a good mocking is just desserts. And funny.

[kateorman.livejournal.com]

*grin* I suspect that letter might've been written by a Christian with the whole camel-and-needle thing in mind. :D

[bex77]

Hee! That letter is wonderful! My favorite response came from Jon Stewart, who said "Shut your pie hole, old man" and then went on to quote bible passages back at him.
http://rawstory.com/2010/01/stewart-to-robertson-shut-your-pie-hole/

[kateorman.livejournal.com]

Jon Stewart preaching is something to see! (And such beautiful words.)

[pedanther]

From metaquotes: Pat Robertson's Meeting With God...Doesn't Go How He Wants It

[kateorman.livejournal.com]

"OH, AND TELL FALWELL TO STOP STALKING ME ON FACEBOOK. IT'S CREEPY AND I'M NOT GOING TO FRIEND HIM BACK."

That made me do a Precious Pup laugh.

[wiliqueen.livejournal.com]

A little long, but entertaining nonetheless. :-)